Love It

 I was thinking recently of childhood memories of the Fremantle area in Western Australia. It was so normal to see older European women wearing black. In all seasons of the year. I asked about it once of my Grandmother who was Australian and of English descent. She explained to me that they wore black because they had lost someone dear to them. A death of a loved one bought out the black clothing for a year. I heard others say that they should stop doing it because it was old fashioned, and even because they smelled bad wearing black in the heat. That was the most ridiculous reason ever in my mind even as a child.  After the year I had in 2020 on a personal level I began to question why they would wear black for a year to show the world they were mourning. We have become so used to mourning being a private affair that we have lost sight of how helpful it is to show it publicly. These women weren't proud of it, they didn't wear it as a badge of honour, or to get sympathy. It wa...

We have a few friends and family who have died. Yes, everyone has.  Our special ones don't have their final resting places near us so we can go and spend time there though. Some don't have any physical monument to their existence. Or they are in another country.  So we made our own. It's the Chopping Board Wall of Fame!  Seriously.  Each one has a quote on a Chopping Board hung on the wall near our patio in the garden. We can raise a glass to them and sit and look at their board just as we would sit and perhaps look at their headstone. So what do we have? One of our best friends boards says "Is this how you want to live your life?"  It was directed at a young man who hadn't washed his bathroom floor!  Hardly poignant or pivotal. Or was it?  That dirty floor was a sign of accepting being the victim of something grotty. Wading through dead skin cells, fur, hair and unspeakables to do the daily ablutions was not how anyone would actually choose to...

I only just discovered this grey streak and it's kind of scary. I now bear more than a passing resemblance to Lily Munster! She had the coolest grey stripes in her hair.  And now I do too. These rapid onset solid grey stripes aren't the normal aging process though they are attached to a trauma.  Young people like me, being only 50 after all, get them.  I was quite surprised when I found 2 of them. I don't know why I'm surprised though.  The last 4 months have been a blur of change, challenge and confusion with a massive workload and little reward if I'm brutally honest.  I don't do things for reward, but when the tasks are huge, some small payout is a nice feeling that you got it right. First there was Emergency trip no. 1, followed by Emergency surgery no. 1.  Not major health issues just a discomfort for the loved one and some sleep deprivation for me. Then there came Emergency trip no. 2, followed by Emergency surgery no. 2.  They shared t...